Strange Confessions: In which I wonder how far God’s sense of humor goes

Strange Confessions: As I mowed the lawn today I was singing a popular Christian song but I changed around the lyrics that might be considered offensive to other Christians.

As some of you know, I started my “Strange Confessions” on my personal Facebook page back in May of 2012. The entries soon became longer and more personal where as I did not want to keep it on my page but decided to make it a blog. I saw people were making blogs on Facebook, so I created the first version of Stranger in Rebellion in December of 2012. I invited a few friends who responded to my first Strange Confessions and some I thought might read and respond. As of now, I have eighteen friends who “like” the Facebook blog. Still, there isn’t the feedback I would like, and maybe I’m really not that interesting to read anyways, but I enjoy the writing, occasionally make myself laugh and discover things about my self and my relationships that I would not have discovered if I had not written about any number of certain subjects.

Well, then came this blog. I wanted to reach a broader audience and in the course of several transitions, get all my writings off Facebook and onto this blog then delete the Facebook stuff. In the course of writing on this blog I have copied and pasted the Strange Confessions as well as the main current writing project and a few other items, onto the Facebook site. But there is some stuff I keep strictly for this site. One was a couple of weeks ago, and now this one. So, faithful readers, you get the benefit of reading some items that are not on the other site. Don’t you feel privileged? There are some things I want to keep away from people who know me, because they might be shocked at some of the things I occasionally think about. Such as today…

First the song:

My mom had a euphemism she always said to me for when I didn’t fulfill all expectations of a job she had given to me. Now for the full warning:

I am going to say some words here that you might not appreciate. But, the word is in the Bible, but it is also occasionally used in improper ways. So if you have a heftier than normal sense of good morals, you might not want to read further.

My mom would say you did this or that “half-assed”. That’s it. She would say that to me a lot. “Oh now Mark this is so half-assed.” “This is a half-ass job.” “Why are you so half-assed about everything I have you do?”

Strange thoughts come into my head when I mow sometimes, as this remembrance did today. I began to think it would have been funny if, as a young man, I could have said back to her, “Oh, I’m sorry mom. Let me give you my whole ass.” “You want me to put my whole ass into this?” “From now on mom, all you are going to see from me, is my whole ass.”

This morning, before mowing, I was fiddling with one of those online computer radio things that plays songs for you when you put in stuff you like and it predicts what you would like. So, the song above came on.

As I was mowing and as happens often with me, my thoughts blended and the lyrics changed as I was praying and mowing. So I had this hybrid of thoughts: my mom and her euphemism, me talking back, the song in my head and my confession to God to give Him my everything from now on. So the lyrics became: “I give you my whole ass, whole ass, whole ass Lord. Whole ass, whole ass, whole ass Lord.” I tell you I make myself crack up, a lot. I thought this was very funny and it wouldn’t get out of my head. I began to wonder if God might be offended by my offering. My wife often says to me, “You’re singing that, to a Christian song?!” because I often do that. I say, “Sorry, you’re right.” Mostly I just change things to “Meow, meow, meow.” But sometimes, it may get a bit offensive: such as today. Now I know God has a sense of humor because he made me, and there is such joy and pleasure in laughter. It makes us healthy and happy, brings us together. Laughter/Humor is a wonderful gift of God’s creation. But does He get angry when I do something that might be so deliberate in its offensiveness? Does He look down at me sternly, arms folded, waiting for me to apologize? Or, might there be a knowing gleam in His eye, as His arms are folded, waiting for an apology? Or, does He just laugh out loud at His creation, at the humor that we can come up with, because sometimes we take ourselves too seriously? After all, it is just music and lyrics. Or does the offering that Jeremy Camp has made somehow become holy and therefore untouchable? Somehow I think not. Somehow I believe there is something in between the knowing gleam in God’s eye and Him laughing out loud. Of course I don’t see God, the Father with arms and standing, staring down at me. I add anthropomorphism to God just as the bible does, so, don’t think I am some sort of heretic. But seriously, should I be concerned with things offered to God, and see them as holy and unchangeable, especially in such a potentially offensive way? We should all be very aware of our attitude toward God in these things and change if we need to.


Posted on August 15, 2013, in Strange Confessions and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. In which I laugh out loud . . . and am glad that despite your disappointment in number of followers you are still writing.

  1. Pingback: Strange Confessions: The Inadequacy of Inadequacy | Stranger in Rebellion

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